Hi, welcome to Lifebuilder!

If you’ve ever been to one of my presentations you’ll know about the extensive research that shows optimists tend to be happier, more successful in all areas of life and live longer. 

Whether you’re an optimist or pessimist depends on your level of expectation. The pessimist expects little to come out of his actions, so he does little. The optimist expects a lot, so he does a lot. Yet we’ve all been warned about the danger of expectation: ”Don’t count your chickens before they’re hatched”, ”Expect nothing and you won’t be disappointed”. There is some truth in this. In fact, too much of the wrong kind of expectation could actually kill you. 

For eight years, Admiral Jim Stockdale was a Vietnam prisoner of war. He and his comrades had no prisoner rights, no set release date and they were regularly locked in solitary confinement and tortured. When asked which of the prisoners were most likely to die, Stockdale replied: “The optimists.” This startled me until Stockdale elaborated: “The optimists were the ones who said, “We’re going to be out by Christmas.” And Christmas would come and go. Then they’d say,‘We’re going to be out by Easter.’ And Easter would come and go. And then Thanksgiving, and then it would be Christmas again. And they died of a broken heart.”

How do we make sense of this, given that extensive research shows that optimists are healthier, wealthier and happier? Is it possible that optimism is just something you should drop if you have the misfortune to become a prisoner of war? I don’t think so, not if you listen to something else that Stockdale said. In his own words: “I never lost faith in the end of the story, I never doubted not only that I would get out, but also that I would prevail in the end and turn the experience into the defining event of my life, which, in retrospect, I would not trade.”

In fact, Admiral Stockdale was the ultimate kind of optimist – a long-term optimist. He had absolute conviction that ultimately, however far into the future it might be, he would prevail. Short-term optimists also believe they’ll prevail, but they believe it will be quick and easy. When it isn’t, shattered by disappointment, they become demoralised and give up. I always think of short-term optimists as being like spoilt kids: they expect to get everything they want now, and if they don’t, they get frustrated and give up. Long-term optimists are in for the long haul. They know that they may have to fight many battles before they finally win the war. 


Until next week - Create Your Self!

 
Justin

Justin Cohen

Who is Justin Cohen? Justin Cohen, the author of Lifebuilder, is a sought-after conference speaker and trainer specializing in motivation, sales and leadership. ‘After Justin came to present, turnover has doubled.’ - Tanya Peche, Sales Manager, EDCON If you are looking for a speaker for your next conference or training session, click here to find out more about Justin Cohen.

P.S.    A few weeks ago, I talked about the movie “What the Bleep
            Do We Know” in Lifebuilder. The movie is about to go off
            circuit and it is a, must-see for everyone. My partner in
            Lifebuild, Jonathan Quail, would like to invite you to come to
            Killarney Mall in Johannesburg this Saturday morning (the
            10th of September) at 8.30 a.m. to watch it. He will be having
            breakfast at 7.15 a.m. before the movie at the Mugg & Bean
            above the cinemas, which you are welcome to join us for. Click
            here and send the email that pops up to let us know if you want
            to come to the movie and / or breakfast beforehand. I hope to
            see you there on Saturday!

P.P.S.  Congratulations to Lazola Feni, the lucky Lifebuild 
             member who won a weekend getaway for 4 people last 
             month. If you would like to have the opportunity to win a
             mid-week break for 4 people to any one of over 130
             resorts in South Africa every month, all you need to do is
             join our Members Club. As a member, you will also be able
             to download the classic motivational book Think and Grow
             Rich by Napoleon Hill as an e-book at no charge - a gift worth
             over R100 - and 4 other lifebuilding e-books. Click here to
             go to our Members Club subscription form and use the
             password 'Lifebuilder subscriber' to join our Members Club
             now.